Constructed in an abandoned Air Force hangar on the outskirts of Fargo, North Dakota by a team of pedagogues, demagogues, and collectors of pogs under the direction of The Head, what emerged was a crack force of fighters. Yes: they are musicians, but fighters first. They fight musical mediocrity. They fight against the urge to remain motionless at live music shows. They fight the laws of an over-reaching government that says, “What are you doing? You have to urinate INSIDE.” They fight for YOU.

The most important thing you need to know about 3 Minute Hero is that all of its members are constructed of carbon-fiber moldings attached to tungsten frames. This is why all of them are so incredibly strong yet light as, say, a medium-sized wedding cake. The Head decided that these nominally human players (all functions stem from their original human brains, but may be over-ridden by The Head) were far more reliable than their all-human predecessors who nearly perished, in their entirety, during the controversial “Krakatoa: We Dare You” festival. Dare they did and paid were the consequences.